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This Thursday is RUOK Day and we want you to take a minute to consider whether someone you know might be struggling. Sometimes we get a gut instinct that something isn’t quite right with a friend, loved one or colleague. Don’t stay silent. Reach out and ask them if they’re okay. RUOK have shared a video that explains it best. As carers our lives can become all about the people we support and sometimes we can develop a mental health illness ourselves. When this occurs we can tend to lose interest in things that we would normally enjoy. Our usual happy demeanor may slip and we could find ourselves withdrawing from our normal activities. However, it might be you that’s noticing changes in your friend’s behaviour – suddenly your reliable gym buddy doesn’t show up on the usual day, or the person who calls you religiously to chat about life, just stops calling. These might be signs that your friend is struggling. If you’re worried, we would encourage you to  call your friend and see how they’re going. That one gesture of kindness could make all the difference for someone who is suffering in silence. As the RUOK website notes,

Communication is a two-way street. It involves a sender (the person speaking), a receiver (the person listening) and the message (what you’re trying to say). When communicating with our loved ones who have a mental illness, it’s imperative that we show empathy and understanding to their needs. Communication is key in interacting with someone with a mental illness and if we demonstrate a lack of empathy, then we risk isolating them or hurting their feelings. To ensure this doesn’t happen, we have put together the following 10 tips that will be a start for you to improve communications with your loved one. 1. Use short, clear direct sentences Long, involved explanations are difficult for people with mental illness to handle. If it goes on too long, they will tune you out. 2. Set boundaries Set limits with the person, as you would with anybody. “I only have five minutes to talk to you”, or “If you scream, I will not be able to talk to you”. 3. Keep it simple Cover only one topic at a time. One direction at a time. Simplicity is key. 4. Know when to back off If the person is becoming agitated, it’s best to

Emotional resilience can be defined as the ability to bounce back from adversity, the ability to calm your mind during or after a negative situation. People who demonstrate a high degree of emotional resilience are able to cope with stresses (minor or major), in a calm and effective manner. Much like other aspects of our persona like IQ, social intelligence and emotional intelligence – emotional resilience is something we are all born with and continues to develop as we grow. However, some of us are more resilient than others. Thankfully, it’s a trait that can be further developed and learned with conscious practice and awareness. As carers, it would benefit us to develop our own emotional resilience. Not sure what that looks like? No problem – all emotionally resilient people share the following eight traits. Have a read and see how you fare. 1. Emotional awareness If you’re aware of how you’re feeling and why, then you are emotionally aware. You also have the ability to understand how others feel because your awareness. 2. Perseverance Perseverance is never giving up in pursuit of your goals. People who have grit and persevere with achieving their objectives tend to be more resilient.